Many people either define themselves by past events and the tape becomes played over and over again in their heads, or they play the 'What if' game, alternative postpone their fulfilment.
Past events may include different forms of abuse (physical, emotional, sexual), traumas (injuries, separations), losses (job, bereavement) and so on. The events were so serious, that although time has passed, the person has frozen and is mentally reliving the events each day.
Similarly, one may be focussing too much on the future. When an opportunity presents itself, it marks the kick off of the 'What if' game: 'What if I fail?', 'What if the person gets angry', 'What if I embarrass myself' and so on.
The issue is that the 'What If' game is rarely played until the end. The actual ending of the game may look like this:
- 'What if I fail' - Then you learnt what you need to improve and you will do better next time'
- 'What if the person gets angry?' - 'If that happens, you will know you did things with good intentions and will be able to explain it to him/her.'
- 'What if I embarrass myself?' - 'People are most often more concerned about themselves, and they will forget about it very soon.'
Another futuristic trap is to believe that happiness and fulfilment is always out there; that right now things suck, but if I only get a job, find a partner, have more money, then I will be happy.
The key to all of the above is to be here now, in the present. On the 15th I will share with you the tools on how you can focus more living in the Now.
Maybe you recognise yourself in the above examples? Then I would love to see you at the seminar!
Take care,
Hermine
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